I feel things so intensely sometimes. The touch of the shirt on my back, the feeling of tiny grains of salt on my fingertips, even small pieces of today snacks in the crevices of my teeth. But I feel bigger feelings too. Feel from the inside out. I feel life encircling my whole body from the tips of my toes in snug fitting shoes to the very breath that I breathe. Sometimes usually when biking, I feel such beauty in the world I could just burst out of my skin and be a part of it all.
I love this song - I Feel It All - Feist
All beautiful things seem to be bought with a price. My roommates and I hiked it two years ago and I literally thought this would be my final destination. We strolled up the coast thinking it was a 30 minute jaunt. We did 8 miles and at one point Brooke was hanging by a root. I started crying at one point and told them to go on without me. Its funny looking back, but at the time I thought my time had come.
What is the most beautiful thing to you?
I was staring at the white bubbles that form after the tide pulls back in, like the head of a turtle. Those little bubbles are so beautiful to me. But then I thought of Sol and the way he looked at me, the first look hes ever looked. And I loved him in an instant. To see the world as if we are seeing it for the first time- if we can do this everyday- it will always be the most beautiful sight.
This semester my house has been turned upsidown every Saturday with the creating of cookies, cupcakes and deserts. Ive been trying to pay tuition by way of treats. It has been exhausting at times but very fun!
I love this encouraging poem...
STICK TO THE TASK
Stick to your task till it sticks to you; Beginners are many, but enders are few. Honour, power, place, and praise Will come, in time, to the one who stays. Stick to your task till it stick to you;Bend at it, sweat at it, smile at it too; For out of the bend and the sweat and the smile Will come life's victories, after awhile.
Cold, hard places perhaps have to spring up every once in awhile so that someone else can have the good sometimes.
I sometimes want to gather up all the beautiful things ever seen, said, watched, felt and painted, and then just hold them for a moment.
But than perhaps if I hogged all the sunshine, held it so tightly in my hands, what good what would it be if no one else could have any?
Arn't I willing to give that up for someone for only a moment?
I love the scripture so much about adversity, "thine adversities shall be but a moment".
It is so true what they say about adversity- it is the refiners fire. This semester in trying to pay for school, I have learned so much in entrepreneurial endeavors. Ive learned new recipies of cookies, cupcakes, and pies and little things like that brownies and chocolate chip cookies are local favorties.
The final Liquidation sale for the baked goods was the best day ever! We stayed up the entire night baking! Part of me was sad as it was the end of the line for the tuition...But Clark made these little flyers to pass out in case people want to place orders, so perhaps the kitchen isnt totally shut down for the semester.
These are known as green tea cupcakes. Very different.
The bake sales offen attract not only local with a sweet tooth but stray dogs, and feral chickens. One unwelcome guest at the Bake Sale- a cannibalistic rooster.
There we were enjoying lunch and our Styrofoam package of chicken was left cracked open on the table, it happen so fast- a rooster, swooped in, and gobbled up, dare I say-a piece of his own kind!
I wanted to cry for how ignorant he was. I dont know why it disturbed me so much, perhaps we do this too? Hurt our own kind but just dont notice. For my Birthday my friend Meagan got me this cute cupcake book that comes with stencils! The heart stencils were great for Valentines day!
This was my favorite day at work EVER! Everyone was being so generous with compliments and loving eachother. I realt like my work relations were strengthened so much on the day of LOVE.
they even made us little valentines bags. I miss elementary school!
This makes me feel safe.
My favorite teacher, my high school art teacher, Mr Ramirez showed it to me. The Potato Eaters by Van Gogh. I still think of it every once in a while.
No one understood why he painted them, they weren't very glamorous. Ramirez said they would work all day in the field picking potatoes and after work they would eat the literal fruits of their labor. Their hands are dirty and big, and even though its dark it makes me feel warm like I want to inch closer and hear what they're saying.
Its dangerous to assume but for some reason I know the Potato Peelers were happy. Coming home at the end of the day to those you love is the best ending anyone could ever have.
Walking to school the other day I had a yellow poster in my hand that made me notice all the other yellow things in the world, how much more noticeable things are when we make it a point to look for them.
For anyone who isnt from New Orleans or catholic: Mardi Gras is a celebration before LENT where all your morals are thrown out the window and then you give something up the next week. I tried to give up chocolate but failed 2 days later. Clark said its okay, because Im not catholic anyway. Well this was my first year celebrating. I came home from school on this Holiday and instead of my lovely roommate Vada, in her place was a peacock peering out over the veranda with a paintbrush in beak.
The magical peacock spread her magic throughout the apartment.